oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
