I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
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