and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
