And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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