break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
it's like iHOP with fire
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Randomize
