I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize