I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Randomize