It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
