I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
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