sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I didn't shave. On purpose
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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