i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
