this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Randomize