Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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