Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
