Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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