Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
