Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Randomize
