If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
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