i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
