Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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