i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Randomize