He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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