I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
