5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
