I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Randomize
