i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Terrible idea I love it
I use my feet as sexual weapons
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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