She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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