Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
