What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
True but thats because hes a fetus.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Randomize
