I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
The feeling are messing with the penis
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
