Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
How naked do you want me to be?
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