She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
this is an emotional support booty call
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
