that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
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