so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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