I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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