how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Operation Purity has been aborted
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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