You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
