why didn't you poke me back
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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