omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Randomize
