he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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