I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize