it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
