I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
