wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
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