but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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