loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize