SEEEEXXX PLEASE
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Randomize
