Pants 0. Shit 1.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
I don't think brook has ever known best
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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