guys are not supposed to queef...right?
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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