You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
